The String

The first time I heard this was when I saw the movie, and it moved me then.  I reread it last night, and it amazes me.  It's an excerpt from Jane Eyre, when Mr. Rochester, under the impression that Jane holds no feelings for him, has told Jane that he is to wed, and Jane must leave.

"It is a long way to Ireland, Jane, and I am sorry to send my little friend on such weary travels: but if I can't do better, how is it to be helped?  Are you anything akin to me, do you think, Jane?"

I could risk no sort of answer by this time: my heart was full.

"Because," he said, "I sometimes have a queer feeling with regard to you - especially when you are near me, as now: it is as if I had a string somewhere under my left ribs, tightly and inextricably knotted to a similar string situated in the corresponding quarter of your little frame.  And if that boisterous channel, and two hundred miles or so of land come broad between us, I am afraid that cord of communication will be snapt; and then I've a nervous notion I should take to bleeding inwardly.  As for you, you'd forget me."

One page over:

"I tell you I must go!"  I retorted, roused to something like passion.  "Do you think I can stay to become nothing to you?  Do you think I am an automaton? - a machine without feelings?  and can bear to have my morsel of bread snatched from my lips, and my drop of living water dashed from my cup?  Do you think, because I am poor, obscure, plain, and little, I am soulless and heartless?  You think wrong!  And if God had gifted me with some beauty, and much wealth, I should have made it as hard for you to leave me as it is now for me to leave you.  I am not talking to you now through the medium of custom, conventionalities, or even of mortal flesh: - it is my spirit that addresses your spirit; just as if both had passed through the grave, and we stood at God's feet, equal,  - as we are!"

"As we are!" repeated Mr. Rochester.

Another page over...

"But Jane - I summon you as my wife: it is you only I intend to marry."

I was silent: I thought he mocked me.

"Come, Jane, - come hither."

"Your bride stands between us."

He rose, and with a stride reached me.

"My bride is here," he said, again drawing me to him, "because my equal is here, and my likeness.  Jane, will you marry me?"

Lastly, as Jane is struggling to believe he is earnest, and has yet to respond to his proposal...

"Jane, accept me quickly.  Say Edward - give me my name - Edward - I will marry you."

"Are you earnest?  Do you truly love me> - Do you sincerely wish me to be your wife?"

"I do; and if an oath is necessary to satisfy you, I swear it."

"Then, sir, I will marry you."

"Edward - my little wife!"

"Dear Edward!"

"Come to me - come to me now," said he: and added in his deepest tone, speaking un my ear as his cheek was laid on mine, "Make my happiness - and I will make yours."

This is how my heart sees and speaks, but peer pressure keeps such words from leaving my mouth.