Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Metal in the Sky

The human heart is surely broken.  One of its biggest problems is that it takes things for granted, and nothing is off limits.  If we could fly like super man, it would be amazing... at first.  In time, you would, if lucky, recognize that you have been flying around for the last few years now without enjoying it. 

Fortunately, this is just something we are prone to do, but it can be fought victoriously, at least by and large.  Every now and then, when I am looking up into the Dallas sky, and I see all those distant black tees, perfectly straight vapor trails in tow, I just stop, and take it in.  I think, "I am looking at a huge piece of metal fly through the air!  What would Newton think if he could see this?  Or George Washington?  Or Moses?  I get in another hunk of metal that, by using thousands of tiny little explosions every second, is capable of zooming me about at seventy miles an hour.  It is a wonder.  It is fun.  It may not be as exciting as when I was fifteen, but it not be totally taken for granted either.  Much joy has been renewed in mundane acts through such reminders. 

I realized today that I have done this with my writing.  I have been beating myself to a pulp for not being as far along on the rewrite of Light Blue as I had wished.  It has been months since I have found any real joy in writing.  Well, God is ever faithful, and today He ministered to my heart by reminding me that I have actually written a novel.  Yes, I need to rewrite it, but that doesn't discount that I wrote a whole book, and that it was good.  It made people cry, feel emotions, empathize, think, all of the things that I yearn to do.  Yet, I have taken no joy in it.  I have believed yet another lie.  Shocker, I know. 

Well, today was on of the first days I have been able to really enjoy what God ha done through me.  I have let it sink in that the work of my mind and hands has evoked much emotion and thought, which is what I desire to do.  Slowly but surely, the passion has been creeping back in.  God is restoring my heart for this novel.  He is clearing my vision a little at a time.  I don't know why this trial is necessary, but I don't need to.  All glory be to Him.  He is all I desire.  All else that brings pleasure is great, but merely a lens, a piece of Him that He has allowed, built for me and you to enjoy. 

I would love to heat your thoughts, so please write a comment.  I pray for you every time I remember you, and it is with thanksgiving in my heart. 

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