Christmas Lightism

Ok.  A bit of explanation for my recent lack of posting and Eeyore-ish Facebook statuses.  We'll see how sharing this goes.  If you don't already know.  I suffered from what is called a severe depressive episode, only unlike "The Office", my episode was not twenty-two minutes long, closer to twelve years.  That being said, by the grace of our Lord I have been made victorious over that for a few years now.  Still, about twice a year it hits me for a few weeks, and I just have to grin and bear it.  In all honesty, it is a really beautiful reminder of a work God did in me that I am all too ready to forget about.  Now, thanks to the prayers of those who know me, this last spell ended today.  

What an intro.  Dork.  Now to my actual post.  Something interesting happened a few days ago, and it has not left me.  Kathleen was sharing stories about North Carolina, and how when she first moved to Texas from there, she hated the way we did Christmas lights.  As she put it, she was being "A Christmas light snob."  She went on to talk about how in North Carolina it just wasn't proper to use anything other than white lights.  She then threw on a southern accent and mocked them playfully saying, "Them colored lights just ain't proper."  Now, tell me your heart didn't pique just a little reading that.  She was talking about lights, nothing else, but being trained as we are today in matters of racism, I physically winced at hearing her talk about how colored lights weren't as good as white ones in North Carolina.  I don't really have anywhere to go with this story honestly, I just think it is interesting.  Maybe not.    On another note, Christmas lights are pretty wonderful, are they not?  I am glad to live in Texas, where some people have them up year round (wink).  I love that there are so many kinds.  I can still see the lights my grandfather used to put up.  They were all blue.  They were the big, glass bulbed kind from the eighties, (the kind you had to be careful with, or they would shatter and kill you) meticulously spaced around the trim of their house on Ward St. in Midland.  Then there are the rope lights Tanner and I used to line the toilet in our dorm room at DBU.  Laugh all you want.  Mock away.  You always knew where the toilet was in the middle of the night.  I am glad that the fad of using those lights that dangle like ice sickles has faded, not because I don't like them at all, but because for a while everyone was using them, and it just felt lazy.  Come to think of it, have you ever seen the multicolored version of the ice sickle lights?  Think about that for a moment.  Multi-colored ice sickles?  What kind of snow would leave such an ice sickle?  I don't even want to know.  

The Ministry of Prayer

Where would we be without the ministry of prayer?  Never mind the effect that other's prayers have had on my life, just thinking about having the ability to pray for others keeps me sane.  As the Holy Spirit draws me nearer, my joy in Christ grows, but so does my desire to glorify Him through service.  Christ identifies Himself with those who suffer, and thus, as Christians, our hearts constantly hurt for those in need.  If you could see inside my heart, you would see a battle ground.  I have never known peace on this Earth past that which is given in the form of hope.  But, as the moment, I see the battle and am swinging.  Yet, to be honest, I feel am mostly hitting nothing but air.  I long to be of service, yet how often do I manage to help anyone?  My wife assuages my fear daily, telling me I am of service, that I have served valiantly, that my fear is nothing but a lie.  When my heart calms, I can see that she is partly right.  But in part, my fear is true.  How much of my life have wasted on doing anything but those things that are of service to others, that profess love?  I am not even in contact with anybody but Kathleen on days when I am writing.  Hopefully my obedience in writing will be used.  So, what keeps my restless heart truly calm is prayer.  How incredibly amazing is prayer?  I can minister to your heart without being near you, or even knowing where you are.  I can but see your face and, whether aloud or in my mind, beseech God on your behalf, and effect your life, and you can do the same for me.  How amazing?!  So, as Paul said to the Colossions, "Devote yourselves in prayer, being watchful and thankful." or to the Philippians, "Do not be anxious for anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."